Wednesday, 16 January 2008

Cute isn't it....

It looks like mouse wars have resumed where they left off last year, except this time they have decamped from the out-house and into the loft, we noticed last night as we were in the bedroom getting Freya ready for her bath we both heard the scurry of small feet in the roof space, too big for a beetle and too small for a rat, therefore by deduction it must be a mouse or mice.... I immediately ruled out shooting them because that would be

a) Time consuming
b) Messy
c) Very hard

plus I don't have the training to balance on rafters with a pair of ninja infrared goggles whilst balancing a very heavy air rifle along with the fact that my wife wouldn't appreciate all the missed shots and holes punched through the ceilings, I considered the humane mouse trap again, but after pulling it out and inspecting it, I'm afraid after the many drownings I used it for when I got fed up of releasing them back into the wild "born free" style only to find they had made it back.....I was losing the battle and looking at the trap and it's the humane mousetrap had to be retired due to heavy rust.....

it was then that I remembered that the previous owners had left an unopened tub of rat/mouse/small child poison so I went on the hunt for it, I found a tub of white grout .....nah that won't work.... a tub of magnolia paint.....again that wouldn't work....AH HA !! one tub of rat/mouse party finger food....

I gingerly got into the loft and set about sprinkling pyramids of said party food..... we just have to wait now until they feast on the finger and claw buffet I have laid on for them..... and squeak their last squeak..... thankfully they aren't rats otherwise the smell would be awful as the bodies piled up..... but knowing my luck I have just discovered the largest single collection of mice in South Wales and will probably end up shovelling them out of the loft by the metric tonne.... you can't blame them really, it's lovely and warm in the loft (and so it should be with every bloody light and electrical appliance left on all day and night !!!)'s just not nice having them as house guests....not to mention the damage their sharp little teeth manage, as I found out twice once with the Christmas lights when I put them out for the Xbox recluses 16th birthday party, only to find out the mice had nibbled through the wires exposing the bare wires and me to 240v.....that made me pay attention.....Andrea on the other hand couldn't stop laughing, and the second time when Andrea had a fit of stupidity and insisted that I catch it in the dog food bin and release it back into the thanked me by sinking it's yellow rodents teeth clean through my thumb....the next one that decided to dine out on dog biscuits got shot so hard it forgot to bleed.... :)

anyway the continuing struggle against mouse domination will rage on until I wipe out every last single rodent and we are a mouse free zone.....once again !!! (it doesn't help living next to fields all around us.... but I can't change that)

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