Thursday, 15 October 2009

I think my daughter is trying to give me a heart attack

I had just taken off my man pinny,  you know the ones with ladies bosoms and a thong on, and had literally just turned off the hoover after doing my Freddy Mercury impression .....when I noticed that it was all quiet in the kitchen where I had left Freya in her high seat, so I called out her name answer... called again as I was moving rather quickly towards the kitchen .... still no answer...... there she was having pulled her chair across the kitchen and was in the process of jabbing a butter knife (metal) into the toaster....

To say my heart skipped several beats, I promptly tripped over myself and in the style of Edmund Blackadder in the final series and in the final scene ... and in just as much slow motion mouthing "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"  I launched myself towards her and removed the offending butter knife from her inquisitive and busy hands.... I smacked the back of her hand to let her know how upset I was at her and she promptly burst into tears..... to be honest I'd rather her be afraid of going near the toaster because of how angry I would get rather than her finding out the hard way .... and 240v through such a small body wouldn't do it much good... anyway after a couple of minutes I calmed down ... and so did she...... I guess it's just one of those phases kids go through where they have to experiment with everything .... I suppose it's no worse than when I was a kid ....I was about five years old I think and my Dad was fixing an old valve radio on the kitchen table, soldering iron out, meter etc ... I was fascinated, he wandered off to get something but told me not to touch the radio or the soldering iron... I didn't touch the soldering iron I knew about those having been burnt by one.... the radio however proved too tempting and I touched one of the components and was promptly thrown across the room.... after dusting myself off I sat back on my chair with tears in my eyes holding my sore hand... my Dad came back in the room noticed me sniffling and said with a chuckle... "you touched the radio didn't you ?" "yes" I said ...."That'll teach you to listen...." .... it did

No comments: