I'd like to buy a new car.....

Certainly Sir which model did you have in mind ?

This one would do nicely thank you :)

Excellent choice Sir....

How would you like to pay for it ?

Oh weekly I think what do the payments work out at ?

Let me see Sir.....ahhh yes with your current income and expenditure we have calculated that will be £40 a week :)

Fantastic..... what next ?

Well just fill out this paperwork and sign at the bottom so we can deduct the money directly from your bank account and it's all sorted :)

Fabulous.... when can I pick the car up ?


Ohhhhh Sorry Sir you can never do that....you misunderstood me


What ? did I ? ....


yes you did you can never take the car home....or drive it....or fill it with petrol or polish it and cherish it, in fact you're not allowed anywhere near it

Pardon ?.....

You can never take the car home....or drive it....or fill it with petrol or polish it and cherish it, in fact you're not allowed anywhere near it......

YES YES YES... I heard you the first time, so hang on a second, I've entered into this agreement to pay £40 a week for this car, but I'm not allowed to go anywhere near it ? not even press my face up against the showroom window to even look at it ?

That's right Sir and if we catch you smearing our windows with your nose will call the police and if you miss a payment we will send around the heavies to drag you to court for non payment.... now bugger off !!!


ridiculous little story don't you think ? nobody in their right mind would pay £40 a week for something they didn't get.....or would they ? apparently so........namely me....

I've just had a letter off the CSA demanding £40 a week backdated to the 16/10/2006, not bad considering I've had about 3 letters off them since the divorce asking for my earnings which I told them. The first letter was to ask what I was earning the second was an exemption certificate and the third one was asking for my earnings again....... this is all to support my two daughters whom I don't see, who have no contact with me, though no choice of my own, where I have asked my ex for contact, I've even asked them.... basically myself and my immediate family even their grandparents who they used to have an excellent relationship with have effectively been expunged from their lives, in fact the only thing that they do carry which is mine is my surname, and no doubt if my ex was allowed to change their surname without my permission, she would have done that by now as well....

I wonder if this is anything to do with her "current" partner being made bankrupt and his various attempts at running a business.... "doing what he has to do to survive" to quote my ex ... and being thwarted by various government bodies and the compulsory liquidation of his companies, not to mention his house being repossessed by the sheriff up in Scotland....I also see now my ex wife is a company director probably out of necessity due to her "man" being struck off as a director at companies house here as being unfit to be a company director, he wants to be careful though he can't run a company through a puppet director..... it's against the law, being a bankrupt he can have no say in running a company, and my ex has an excellent business head on her shoulders.......not.....you work out the rest..... doesn't take a plasma physicist....(even a bankrupt one) .....


as for the CSA, I will appeal of course, I wouldn't mind one little bit supporting my children..... if I was allowed to see them, or if they made contact, even emails (they know my email address it hasn't changed in 10 years) or letters or even a single photograph, or even showed the slightest bit of interest in me, my life or anything to do with me.....alas that isn't the case :(

this would have been so much easier for both parties if my ex had agreed on contact at the time of the divorce with the kids, but instead now it's been years since I have seen them.....there is no relationship......time has eroded any chance of reconciliation it seems.......and it's all come down to money at the end of the day.... how sad..... :(

and it's madness that one family has to suffer financially to support another, my ex has a man who isn't capable of supporting her, obviously or the CSA wouldn't be involved.... and I wouldn't mind paying if I had some kind of feedback or contact...or even choice in the matter..... I also pay for another man's kids through my own free will and choice and if this appeal fails it's simply means my step children will suffer financially, the buck has to stop somewhere..... it's a house of cards.... the domino effect........next !!!

this isn't helping children it's depriving one to pay another, but if I have to pay because it's the law then that's what I'll have to do, we will just have to find the cash from somewhere..... I'd sell one of my children but unfortunately they don't speak to me.....


anyway lets see what the future brings, one thing since leaving my ex, I'm the eternal optimist knowing that things can and do improve :)